The Kiss? A Miss

So I decided to date around a bit and see if I can't find a more generous SD. Yesterday I went on a date with this guy I'll call Frank. I'm pretty laid back and not much of a talker so I was able to tolerate Frank's ceaseless jabber. But he reminded me of my ex in that he subtly would make me feel like I'm inferior. And I could tell he was definitely shopping for a GF. Now I met him off of sugardaddie.com and I have to say I've had so much better luck off of seekingarrangement.com in terms of potential SD's. It seems like so many guys on sugardaddie.com are interested in a long term Relationship and that's the last thing I want. I don't want to be in a relationship with ANYONE, for at least a year at this point in my life. I want to keep everything light, this is supposed to be a business arrangement for me. So Frank takes me to TGIF's, and I forgot to bring my ID with me so I just had a coke and he ordered a whole thing of nachos. He doesn't make much eye contact with me the whole date, his eyes are focused on the game. At the end he asks the bartender how much and the guy says something like $4 and Frank says don't forget nachos and bartender changes it to $10 which I thought was cool of Frank until as we're walking out and he says "Did you see what I did there? I didn't try to get away with paying less. This is how I am, I have character." Vomit. I did let him kiss me at the end of the night and he wiggled his tongue all around my mouth like his tongue was having an epileptic seizure or something. Tasted like nachos. I thought because he was older he might know how to kiss really well but I was wrong to assume that. Really made Mr. C seem like an angel. Now there is another man who wants me to call him at his office who claims to be offering $10k a month but I really doubt it's the real deal. I'll contact him and see if he seems legitimate. Strangely I miss Mr. C. The next time I see him I'm going to bring up allowance and ask if in July he can give it to me in the beginning of the month. He's a really good kisser and a really kind person; I'm glad I met him and maybe he is the right one for me.

Splenda, not Sugar?

I'm wondering if Mr. C is the right SD for me. I've seen him like 4 times now, but the second time I told him he didn't have to give me money or anything and the third time he didn't give me any money but today he asked me how much I would like and I said, "Could I maybe have $300?" He said that was a little high and could he give me $200 and I said sure. But I'm wondering should I have tried for $250? Am I being too nice? I wish he had just given me a lump sum allowance at once it would be a lot easier. Maybe I should suggest it but I think he'd worry that I'd rip him off. Anyway, I realize I'm being beyond submissive and that I need to take a stance and look at this like a business thing but I'm actually really attracted to him. He has very long eyelashes, beautiful eyes. Now something that he is concerned with is being in public with me I've noticed. It's because I look so young, gosh I could pass for 15! My baby face is dooming me and I'm acting like a child too, not being assertive about allowance and things of that nature. New rule for myself: I will never refuse money from him. Question, is it rude to ask for money if the guy doesn't pull out his wallet? Like to remind him? I thought maybe he would give me more and be diplomatic about it since he forgot to give me money 3rd date but hm. Anyway, I think this is a temporary situation also because he is totalllllly different from me. I love writing poetry and he doesn't even like to read. He's immersed in the DOW and I don't really care much about economics (though I know almost all SDs would be interested in that stuff!) Anyway I've stayed in touch with several guys who are very eloquent and charming. I have a tentative date in the city with one who has been impressing me with his knowledge of poetry, opera, the arts....only thing is these are significantly older men, in their fifties and Mr. C is only 36 and that was a huge selling point for me actually (and also the fact he is single). Something else I like about Mr. C is I can tell he actually cares about me and is very respectful. Although, if I stay with him I realized that I will have to have sex with him....Sex in my mind was always something very serious and reserved for people I am enamored with but I think in this situation I need to adjust my perspective. I'm really nervous about Sunday actually I find myself also putting off dates with guys I'm so shy. Now to find someone who can appreciate that without taking advantage : /

Temporary SD? Possibly Permanent?

I found a SD! What should I call him....I suppose Mr. C works for now. He makes more than $1 mill a year,  and promised $2500 a month to see him a couple times a month. He doesn't want me seeing anyone else and if I do, I'm supposed to tell him. Wellll I met him today and we had a quick chat and I'm $15o richer which is nice considering I was pretty much utterly broke. I left my cell phone in his car, total faux pas (yes I went in his car but I didn't have sex with him and I really don't intend to) but I spoke with him online and I said I'll just pick it up next time I see him. I know he isn't offering a whole lot financially, but he thought I was really hott and the thing is he is SUPER NICE! He isn't a creep or serial killer, I am really good with vibes and this guy is all right. He does have a foot fetish, but that doesn't even weird me out. I don't care for feet, though. He wasn't even creepy about it he just casually admitted it. The thing with him is, he is YOUNG, totally young considering. He's only 36, handsome, and Persian! He even has a sexy accent. I don't know I have a really good feeling about this and I don't think I'll bother going out with anyone else, at least for now. He seems like he can really provide for me financially, I'm not looking for much and I know this is the first date I've gone on or whatever but if I can find someone willing to treat me like a princess, and someone who doesn't have any immediately discernible negative qualities, I don't know why I would look for someone else. I'm pretty darn happy all things considered. He wants to take me to Atlantic City with him. Maybe I can be his lucky charm. He has really nice eyelashes :)...Oh and about the sex. I actually told him I don't know if I would feel comfortable having sex, and that I'm pretty inexperienced (I've only had sex with 3 men) and don't want to have sex with anyone right now. I said everything else is fine, but sex no. And he was actually okay with that...um yeah. Lol I know he is probably going to try and change my mind, but who knows if he stays sweet maybe I'll want to. 

Slim Pickins

I'm a bit exasperated. Yesterday, I signed up at sugardaddie.com to expand my prospects and was contacted by a number of men but I realize that you guys are right and that the number of men who are actually respectful, classy, and are articulate is so low. It's pretty disappointing. I think I will have to resume my job search as I don't even have money to travel the city to go on dates. Perhaps I could borrow some money from my parents, but I hate borrowing money from them. I wish I could just magically meet the perfect SD but it's really not going to happen. The guy I was talking to from Boston who promised to put me up in a nice hotel stopped emailing me and it's only been about a week but that feels like a long time. He was the only man that was married that I would actually be interested in getting to know. I asked if he had a cell I could text him at and never heard back from him, and I realize that he's probably busy but it's a little disheartening. A couple of men gave me their phone numbers after I spoke with them but I'm so phone shy it's really sad. I operate much better in person. You should see me when I'm on the phone, I can't help but pace really anxiously all over the house. I don't know what I'm so afraid of it's not like they're going to leap through the phone and hurt me or anything. I guess I'm just afraid I'll mess up and in person I could at least try to use my feminine wiles to divert attention away from brief moments of ditziness. It's funny, for some reason I think I do come off as ditzy in person; I have a tendency to giggle a lot and smile but if anything I do it out of nervousness. It's a lot easier for me to write, thoughts tend to flow more readily and I guess there just isn't as much social pressure in my mind. One funny thing that happened was I was talking to this one gentleman and was interested until he sent me his pictures....now I am not very superficial believe it or not but I do think attraction is important in a SD/SB relationship. This is the picture he sent me (I edited it for anonymity)

Lol he sent me other "normal" pictures too and I'm thinking he has a sense of humor but I don't know it really weirded me out for some reason. He kind of resembled Albert Einstein, too. Anyway I'm hoping all of your searches are going really well. I think when I find the right one, I'l just know it

Choices

Hi hi hi to everyone who has been kind enough to leave a comment or warm welcome I really appreciate it!!

There haven't really been any crazy developments so far as my search is concerned...I'm meeting with a man who works a mere 10 minutes away from my house on Wednesday; he has specified on his SA profile that he can pay 3-5k a month and is quite wealthy, and I spoke with him briefly on the phone and he seemed pretty earnest and interested. Just a cup of coffee...technically I'm not supposed to have caffeine cos I have this weird heart condition but one cup won't hurt. My dad made me an appointment with the cardiologist actually, and its either tomorrow or next Tuesday. I don't really think I need to go but, whatever.
The past few days have been fun I detoxed from the Internet which was good I've definitely spent too much time online lately. Hung out with one of my friend "A", and her husband. She's 20 with a 2 year old son and he is 18. They're going to prom and she showed me her dress it's pretty fantastic. Then we went to the mall to find them accessories and things like that. (A has a lot of money because her grandma is wealthy and she is leaving almost everything to A, including 600k, and a million dollar house.)

I really am not well versed in fashion or anything like that; but strangely I have always had expensive taste. At the mall A was looking at Coach bags (she already has a ton) and fancy expensive watches and I started to look at everything with new eyes. Maybe not so long from now I WILL be able to afford a cute purse that in the past I only would have admired from afar. I don't want to get ahead of myself but I've always been a dreamer and how fantastic would it be if my dreams turned to reality? Anyway, A didn't find a purse that matched her dress and shoes well enough (I thought some did but she has much better fashion sense than me!) and she and I wandered away while her husband looked at watches for himself. Later, he pulled me aside and showed me that he had gotten a watch for her instead which I thought was SO sweet. She's going to love it. It's not the Michelle watch she wanted (which was $900) but it is still very nice. Then he took us to another store and INSISTED on buying both of us whatever we wanted. I was like wow. Because that's not how I am...and yet I'm looking for a SD. This whole situation with me looking for a SD is completely contrary to my nature but I think maybe the reason for it has something to do with me being compulsively nice to every man that's been involved with me to the point where I've paid for everything and have never experienced a situation where someone wanted to take care of me. My father spoiled me rotten as a child and I was always daddy's little girl but for some reason that never translated properly into my adult life and everything was backwards. Now here I am, 21 and confused as hell but certain about one thing: I want me a sugar daddy darnit! lol oh man...

Anyway I didn't know what to do but any shirt or skirt my eyes rested on A's husband would pick up and ask me if I liked it and was just very commanding and said it would insult him if I refused so I finally gave in and picked a few things I actually liked including this adorable hippie dippie shirt that had a real boho feel to it. A and I got matching teddies and the same pair of shorts. I just felt so spoiled but it was kind of awesome. I ended up sleeping over A's house and the 3 of us went to look for cars for her husband. We went to a couple of dealerships and I saw this beautiful convertible and fantasized about actually having a car like that one day.
A and her hubby bought blue lights for the interior of their Escalade and later that day we watched The curious case of benjamin button....I guess this all wasn't too SD related but I did get spoiled which was awesome! I'll update this after I've had a date, cheers to all you girls and thanks again for reading this!
~Honey

Boston Charmer

One more thing. I swear. Before I pass out...lol!
Okay okay okay
I clearly have deprived myself of blogging for far too long (let me clarify; I used to blog back in the day and had a nice following...I'm sure my faithful audience would be shocked if they knew about this one!)
Anyway, there is ONE more guy who I think has real possibility. He is very attracted to me, lives in Boston, is married (unfortunately), I am attracted to him, and he has promised me an allowance of 2k a month if we click and he seemed really eager to meet me. He also asked if I had a passport and explained that he loves to travel to exotic locations...This all sounds very exciting/glamorous to me as the farthest I've gotten from New York is Florida. The only problem is he lives in Boston, so it's a little bit of a trip but I'm hoping that it's worth it and that we click. I don't really know how I'm going to explain any of this situation to my parents...I suppose I could tell them I'm visiting my ex who conveniently does live in Boston. But sooner or later if I start seeing someone they're going to catch on that something is going on. I have kiddingly said that I need to find a sugar daddy (being the fool that I am) and my parents would KILL ME....even though I am 21 I am still living under their house and expected to abide by their rules. Further, I don't want to disappoint my father. Him losing faith in me would be absolutely devastating as he is one of the most important people in my life.
But oh, I need money. And I've tried, I've tried. I applied to over 30 jobs, even jobs that pay minimum wage. So far, nothing. I had ONE measly interview and I didn't even get hired. I also missed a handful of interviews because I was having troubles with my now-ex boyfriend.

All of this is somewhat of a last resort, but maybe this is exactly what I need to get back on my feet and feeling good again. I've never been pampered before by a man outside my family, and I don't see why I shouldn't be.

Still, the thought of shenanigans (one of my favorite words btw) occuring between me and someone married makes my stomach churn. If I'm that upset just thinking about it, how the heck would I be able to handle it in person? Answer? Alcohol.

Potential Daddys?

Okay I knowww this is my third post today but I just had to write here....there was a very elegant, articulate gentleman who contacted me who I am totally interested in. I didn't ask for his picture, and he didn't ask for mine but on an intellectual level I feel like we have definitely clicked. He is an arts dealer and makes more than $500,000 a year...furthermore, he contacted me first which I definitely see as a good thing. Also, he isn't married! (Just separated)  He is 49, blue eyed, well travelled....I have a really good feeling about him! Our email exchange was wonderful; he wasn't crass like a lot of people I have encountered on the site and he seems genuinely interested in someone with brains (and, well, youth)

And while I am only looking for one sugar daddy I have set up a date with a man at a discreet bar. This one IS married (I wonder if I'll get cold feet) and interested in someone submissive (which I admittedly am). I actually spoke with this gentleman on the phone and he sounded normal and sane, which I have to say is a good start! And he 47, supposedly in good shape...I'm not so sure about this one but I did talk to him on phone and IM and we ARE meeting in a public setting so I'm not too worried as I know how to hold my ground. 

The other potential SDs I've spoken with: Well, some of them send me compliments and tell me that I'm sexy/beautiful but then nothing seems to come of it...I wonder what's up with that